I Complain Too Much
So if you don't have anything nice to say, come sit here by me.
You probably don’t know it yet, but it won’t be long before a new social video platform like TikTok will make its way into the App stores.
The only reason I know this is because it was founded and is being built by one of my good friends, but it has relevance here, because it may be the only video platform I’ll ever use if I’m shameless enough to complain on video.
But it won’t be Meaghan on this new platform.
It will be the real me, who has already claimed her handle and named her channel:
“C’s Complaint Corner. Don’t have anything nice to say? Come sit over here by me.”
I won’t lie or even try to hide it - I know I’m a complainer.
But it wasn’t until my boyfriend randomly said to me mid-conversation “you complain a lot” when I really started noticing that most of the things that come out of my mouth (and certainly most of the things swirling around in my head) are of a negative inclination.
It’s true.
I am unhappy with most aspects of my life and the world I live in, so making casual, light, or fun conversation is not coming easily these days.
I am disgusted with the half of the people in this country who voted for and continue to support Cheeto Dick Donald Trump and everything his “administration” is doing.
But can we even call it an “administration” though?
They’re not really managing or running the government, in my opinion.
It seems like everything they do is a knee-jerk reaction lacking forethought only to be reversed when they realize they’re idiots.
Why do China’s tariffs keep getting delayed?
Why are “agents” “arresting” “illegals” in plainclothes with masks covering their faces?
Why is anyone okay with the “government” deciding it’s a good idea to spend up to $2 BILLION dollars to retrofit that plane gifted to Trump by Qatar when there’s something called the Emoluments Clause written right the fuck into the US Constitution?!
Eh, but who cares, right?
(What about her emails?!?!?!)
Life is simpler and better and more peaceful when you stay out of politics, right?
When you stick your head in the sand and don’t participate in our democracy?
When you tell me “I don’t watch the news,” like you’re proud of it, like you’re just above what is going on in the world if it doesn’t personally affect you at all?
You’re a bunch of assholes.
I will encourage anyone to complain about what is going on in this country and its government right now.
Please, list me your feels so if I need to, I can take your hypocritical pointing finger, turn it around, and use it to poke you in the dome if you don’t realize you’re part of the problem.
The enshittification of this country is escalating at an alarming pace.
Every day I think more (and more seriously) about finding a commune that will best suit my personality, selling everything I own, and leaving the world behind.
“We made the world wrong” is a statement I’ve been using way too much lately, as well as:
“I don’t think we’re going to make it as a species” , and
“We don’t deserve to be here on this planet.”
Am I wrong?
So many people tell me “just stop watching the news every day” but that is not the solution to my disgruntled state.
We should be watching the news, because we should be angry and disgusted over what we are seeing there!
If you stick your head in the sand and look down on all the people around you who are legitimately afraid of our democracy crumbling, you’re a privileged asshole!
I mean it; I don’t even give a shit anymore.
Let me lose followers, let me lose friends, let me lose my fucking life if by some twist of horrible fate I become pregnant and need to nullify that situation with a wire coat hanger.
(Okay, here is where I’m being dramatic because I live in one of the most liberal states in the U.S. that will never ban abortions. Well, ya know, if by some luck the Constitution remains upheld in the next few years and states get to keep their rights.)
But even in this liberal state, the federal funding cuts are the first example of “trickle down economics” I’ve ever seen in my life.
The rich get richer, and the rest of us trickle down the only ladder we have to cling to, and keep trying to climb just to be able to survive.
A lot of state programs that were funded by the federal government have already been cut or eliminated.
Where I work, I’ve already seen an entire social services program for Veterans be eliminated, and two people lost their jobs.
Multiply that by every city and state in the country that just had a cut to Veteran’s benefits of any kind, and you have thousands of lost jobs, and millions of Veterans left with less support than they even had before.
Just yesterday I found out that an agency that we work with had been blessed by receiving a Federal grant last year that would have covered everyone’s salaries for two years.
In January, the grant was rescinded and eliminated.
In January.
Huh. Imagine that.
I guess my point of all of this is - It’s not like I don’t have any reasons to be complaining all the time.
If it’s not money problems, daughter problems, the terror of not knowing or feeling like I have control of my future, my own health problems both physical or mental… it’s something else.
Last night, I told my boyfriend: “I love you, but I hate my life,” and it didn’t surprise me to hear that he’d basically said the same words to his therapist earlier that day.
“I love her, but I hate my life.”
And I do love him, and I do hate my life, and I hate the country I am living in, and just about half of the people in it.
I am so thoroughly, utterly fucked up in the head.
I’ve fucked up my life, my daughter’s life, my boyfriend’s life, his family’s lives, and just by being me, I’ve been dragging everyone down along with me, and I don’t want to keep doing it anymore.
I have to change my life.
I really fucking hope I’m ready.
BUT! If you’d like help me pay bills, I appreciate every generously donated dollar. Hit the pic below, it will take you to my Ko-fi page:
If I were to be 'living' in the dis-United States of America right now, not only would I be complaining about the cruelty of the Mango Mussolini's promise to Make America Great Again, when all that he has achieved is to Make America Grate Again, I would be disillusioned, disconsolate and devastated. However, the sad reality is that only a little over 31 in 100 eligible voters cast a ballot in favour of this orange-hued buffoon, or Putin's door mat, whilst just under 31 in 100 eligible voters supported Kamala Harris. All up, nearly 40 in 100 eligible voters chose to not turn up and vote. So far from having 50 per cent of voting eligible citizens supporting him, his Presidency is not founded on being the best person for the job as seen by the far greater majority of his fellow citizens. For all that it might be worth (or worthless), you have my sympathy Meaghan.
I hate my life too! May I join you in a bitch session?
Yes, the state of the country (that I'm really wishing I'd left in 80s when I first considered it,) but also the fact that my wife has escalating Alzheimer's and I'm her caregiver, which leaves me zero time to enjoy anything. It's a horrible disease.
And you know what? Sometimes I become one of those "non-news" people because I just can't handle anything BUT being a caregiver.
I retired early because of her diagnosis, then Covid hit. This is not the retirement I hoped for. A cautionary tale to remind people not to wait until later.
Let us know about this new app. I may be joining you. I just have to decide whether to be Jack or...my real name.